What He deserves

Reading Mark 12
He only wanted the fruit from His garden
The money that was His
Think that we have lost our idea of sacrifice... we no longer have to sacrifice (goats, sheep, whatever), but now we are not used to sacrifice and we don't sacrifice the things we should and we keep the things that are rightly His.
Think that all He really wants from us and for us is love.
LORD and LOVE are only a few letters different... weird thought of today... R is not far from V and D is right next to E.

Confidence in Christ

This is a journal entry from the other day when God convicted me of something and then led me through His word on what it says on the matter... please keep in mind this is stream of consciousness

Read Mark 9:33-37
They were arguing about who was the greatest, but then they didn't want to tell Jesus so they must have known it wouldn't be pleasing to Him. I don't necessarily argue that I am the greatest (ok maybe sometimes) but more of doing a one up or this is something that I know that you don't, or this is something that I've experienced - just different ways of wanting to be the greatest / first.

vs. 35 If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all.

But should I want to be first? i want to be first, the right one, the one in control - but should I desire that? He was speaking to men who wanted to be first, have the power - they already had that desire.

Then He lead me to
Luke 6:31
Do to others as you would have them do to you.

Then He lead me to
Phil 2:1-4 (just before 5-11)
1If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. 3Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

My self confidence should come from being united with Christ, in humility I should consider others better than myself.

He also pointed out to me that Phil 2:5-11 was Christ living out what he asked his disciples to do in Mark 9:35 - pretty neat stuff!

To know Him

He just wants me to know Him. Is that why I study the Bible? Do I read for knowledge or to get to know Him more? Again back to Matt 7:7... Ask and you shall receive, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened. Am I reading to answer the questions in the book or to know my Heavenly Father and King????

Shhh

When was the last time you listened to the birds and their chirping, the crickets and whatever noise they make... yesterday we went tubing on a river down here in Bongolo for 3 hours - it was AWESOME! But at one point in the journey things were fairly quiet and I started to wonder what kind of animals made all those noises... isn't it amazing how such small animals can make such loud noises (actually I wondered that back home sometimes when a cricket would get into my room!). Lately I've just felt a call to be quiet before Him. To quiet all the voices in my head... the thoughts... and just listen. But the thing is that, although the jungle is beautiful and filled with many noises, they didn't seem that different from the ones back home. Be quiet before Him today.

Ask (part 2)

So I've been asking and I have received... at least a little bit, but it was tremendously encouraging to me! I'm so glad that He encourages me to believe in Him! Also thought today that maybe it is given in His time and not mine. Abraham was given beaucoup des enfants, but he never actually saw them. Do I believe what I may never see? Continues to be a struggle for me.

Ask and you will receive

Currently memorizing these verses in English and French... haven't finished yet, but struggling with understanding and believing.

Matthew 7:7-8
Ask and it will be given to you - Demandez et l'on vous donnera
Seek and you will find - cherchez et vous trouverez
Knock and the door will be opened to you - frappez et l'on vous ouvrira

What should I be asking? After reading the book from the guy who started YWAM - I wonder, am I just not believing that He will answer me? Does He answer everyone? (In the next verse it does say "everyone who asks receives"). Do I need to know? If I knew would I still do it? So many questions and it feels like so few answers.

Ce matin

Ce matin (this morning) dans l'eglise (in the church)... God was hitting me hard with different thoughts - most not thoroughly thought through yet
I'm pretty much in this relationship to get/receive... I make sure that I hear sermons in English, but do I worship in English?? What do I give to this relationship? What do I sacrifice for Him? How do I exalt Him?
Nothing like stepping out of your comfort zone to challenge you a little...

Are you excited to see me?

You know how it feels when you greet a friend and they are all excited to see you... I think that's how God might feel when the Gabonese come to worship Him. They come to worship with excitement... dancing, smiles, clapping - like they are glad to be there.

Grub worms

I've recently read the book "Believing God" by Beth Moore and it really challenged me on what I believe about God and that I do believe Him. One of my favorite quotes from the book is "We have no idea who we are dealing with". I've also read a book of late called "Exodus" by Leon Uris, it talks about the sufferings of the Jews quite a bit and I began to wonder - why?
Why did 8 million Jews have to die? Why did the Egyptians chasing Moses have to die in the Red Sea? Sometimes I have thoughts that I don't outright ask Him, but just wonder about. But He knows my thoughts and every now and then chooses to answer His child. He doesn't have to answer me... I haven't even asked really. The other thing I learned from that book is that He is THE KING! He doesn't have to answer to us, explain to us, etc. This is not a democracy! He is in TOTAL CONTROL! On one hand that's hard for someone like me (control freak), on the other it's a relief... if only I trust Him! Anyway, back to the grub worms... so the other day I was spreading some mulch for Dad. There was quite a few grub worms in it and I knew they were bad for his garden, and I knew I had to kill them. I do not like killing grub worms... they squish and all this liquid comes out... it's nasty! After killing a few it hit me... God doesn't like having to kill His creation either! But He knows what's good for His garden and what has to go. The grubs were not my creation and I did not hear the sounds of the other grub worms crying at the their friends death. I had a new respect for God. This is His creation and His garden, He knows what's best for it and what has to go. I don't always understand, but then I'm don't need to and I'm pretty sure my little brain couldn't fathom it all.

One other thing I learned from the book by Beth Moore is to write down your "God spots" - I think that's what she called them. This is one of them.